Shredded Wheat Frosted Chocolate Strawberry Cereal Review
Strawberries and chocolate remind me of romance. Not that I know a lot about romance. I’m not the chick-flick loving, fairy tale princess needs a prince, roses on Valentine’s Day, swoon over sweet gestures kind of girl. I’m more of the laugh at farts, let you watch football with your friends, shove our faces with junk food while we watch Die Hard, and share my McNuggets with you kind of girl. That’s romance to me. However, I know that chocolate and strawberries are aphrodisiacs and a lot of people like to incorporate them into their romantic encounters. So, when I saw the new Shredded Wheat Frosted Chocolate Strawberry cereal, I immediately thought, “awww, Post is getting all romantic up in here!”
Shredded Wheat has really come a long way. They are originally just biscuits of whole grain wheat that you probably saw your grandpa eating every morning. That’s because wheat is a soluble fiber and helps make you “cleanse” your body (they help you poop). Now, we find Shredded Wheat in a variety of fun flavors and even some that are stuffed with sweetness. This new, romantic version sounds pretty damn good. I dimmed the lights, turned on some Kenny G on my record player, unbuttoned the top button of my modest Little Mermaid pajamas, and prepared to get busy with this new cereal.
When I opened the box, it was almost like the chocolate and strawberries were just waiting to emerge. A puff of genuine, sweet milk chocolate, and sugary, tart, artificial strawberry wafted into my face. I tried one without milk, and was surprised. I didn’t really pick up on the chocolate flavor, but the artificial strawberry was definitely yummy! It wasn’t until the aftertaste hit me that I noted the chocolate. It was a chalky aftertaste… almost a plastic chocolate taste.
Milk delicately danced into the bowl, embracing each piece of the sultry brown and seductive pink biscuits. The shy biscuits beckoned the milk as it softly infused itself into them. And the two became one…. look at me, getting all romantic and shit!
I had to take a few bites of this cereal to really give a good opinion of it. It was confusing to me (kind of like romance). The chocolate flavor was so light and mainly came in the aftertaste, but the strawberry (although artificial tasting) was quite delicious. The strawberry actually reminded me of Cotton Candy Twinkies. I can’t decide if I am disappointed, or like it. The more it sat in the milk, the less the chocolate flavor was hitting me. However, as the milk soaked in, it took on the strawberry flavoring.
I’m really trying to get sexy and romantic with this cereal. I really want to love it. It lacks the substantial milk chocolate taste that should have been the base flavor. I mean, the chocolate is baked into the wheat. After finishing nearly an entire bowl and half of the Kenny G album, I’m still not that turned on by this cereal. Had it just been strawberry with regular Shredded Wheat, I probably would have adored it. I just don’t feel a connection. Don’t worry, Shredded Wheat. It happens to a lot of guys.