Hot Cocoa Oreos Review
Let’s get real for a minute, if we could. Oreo Cookies. The famous, loved by the world, classic cookie. I’m not a huge cookie fan, and honestly don’t really enjoy Oreos. The wafers get stuck in my molars, and I just find them kind of pointless. If I’m gonna eat a cookie, I want the classic cookie flavors to come through – butter, flour, and sugar. I have, however, enjoyed the almost monthly introduction of a new Oreo flavor this year. I liked the Cookie Butter Oreos and Apple Pie Oreos. I even enjoyed a few of the Pumpkin Spice Oreos. But did Nabsico finally run out of good ideas? The new Hot Cocoa Oreos were introduced this month. In my experience, when products try to mimic the flavors of hot cocoa, they end up tasting like generic chocolate. Needless to say, I didn’t have a lot of faith in these new Hot Cocoa Oreos. Slap on a fake smile, and feign a positive attitude – here we go.
The image on the package of the Hot Cocoa Oreos is a big, red mug of hot cocoa with two huge marshmallows floating on top. It’s festive, but doesn’t make me want to drink hot cocoa, nor does it inspire any need for an Oreo cookie. The cookie pictures on the package shows two chocolate wafers hugging both white and brown creme. Marshmallows and hot cocoa. I get it.
I took two big ass whiffs when I opened the bag. And it smelled like the chocolate wafers. It smelled like Oreo Cookies. I didn’t get a sense of warmth like you would with hot cocoa. And YES, skeptics – a product can smell warm without being warm. Proof: Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats. Those bitches smelled warm.
Now for the taste test. Is it possible that I could be totally wrong about these cookies? Is my crappy attitude totally uncalled for and intolerant of a wonderful marketing campaign for the new season? Could I just be a total asshole and want this cookie to fail? No. I don’t want anything to fail. Except asparagus and Cersei from Game of Thrones. They pretty much fail on their own without my crap attitude.
I took a bite, closed my eyes and imagined myself curled up outside on the porch under a blanket, watching the snow fall gently outside on a beautiful October morning. I thought that might inspire me. It turns out that my imagination is just as full of shit as these cookies. I don’t have a porch and I live in Dallas, Texas. It was 87 degrees here yesterday. And these cookies… they taste nothing like hot cocoa. In fact, they taste exactly as I imagined when I bought them: like Oreos.
After two more cookies, licking just the creme, and making my boyfriend eat a few, our conclusion remained the same. These were a huge disappointment. They literally taste like a classic Oreo cookie. The mild and very manufactured chocolate part of the creme is drowned out in the chocolate wafers. And the pathetic attempt to make their everyday Oreo creme filling magically become a “marshmallow” creme was a total flop. There is no hot cocoa flavor, which was honestly to be expected. When companies try to be cute and incorporate a festive, cold weather beverage into their already chocolate-flavored cookies, the best thing you can get out of it is an adorable package.
Oreo, we’re officially in a fight. Don’t talk to me or try to tempt me with some fun new flavor until you have something amazing to bring to the table. How about a Peppermint Mocha Oreo? Even a Gingerbread Spice Oreo on the golden wafers would be clever. But you pissed me off and made me waste $3 on this product. *stubbornly crosses arms, huffs and turns head furiously*
The packaging was uninspiring. The whiff test failed to make me feel warm and cozy. The cookies were unimaginative at best. Bottom line…. O-R-E-no.